Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
There are leaves in my underwear?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
