That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Just cropdusted the office
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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