just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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