Small penises have feelings too.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
