did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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