My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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