And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
