I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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