i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
two words: eviction party
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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