Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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