im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
