halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
