I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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