i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
