Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
