is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
