we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
