We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
