Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
i think im in europe. pls send help
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
