I'm eating all of the evidence.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
