I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
