Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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