can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
