Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
