You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize