found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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