You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
