I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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