There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Im just a social blackout drinker.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
