Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
