i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
They have beer where we have blood.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
