marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
