Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
