I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
