if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
