I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
