We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
is wine microwaveable?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
