How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
