I need help removing her.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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