in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
