I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
high people should be assigned attendants
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I AM VODKA MAN
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
