Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Randomize
