please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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