perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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