Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
