When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
