This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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