dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
