Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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