Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
