I want to stick my p in your. b.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
